Back to school

To all the guys heading back to school this week, be sure to remember Mike Damone's Five Point Plan for getting chicks:



“All right. Now, pay attention. First of all, you never let on how much you like a girl. ‘Oh, Debbie...hi.’ Two. You always call the shots. ‘Kiss me, you won’t regret it.’ Three. Act like wherever you are, that’s the place to be. ‘Isn’t this great?’ Four. When ordering food, find out what she wants, then order for the both of you. It’s a classy move. ‘The lady will have the linguine in a white clam sauce, and a coke with no ice.’ And five. Now, this is most important, Rat. When it comes down to makin’ out, whenever possible, put on side one of Led Zeppelin IV.”